setting us straight and a new mindset

i love purging stuff. 

if aaron and i had it our way, we would probably be living a minimalist lifestyle.  but kids have this knack for mysteriously accumulating stuff.  actually, we all do.  but it feels AMAZING when we get rid of stuff.  not only does our house look less cluttered, i feel like my brain feels less cluttered.

we've been going in waves when it comes to purging our stuff.  especially the kids' stuff.  things that don't receive attention or not in use for the past year is given away (or thrown away if broken).  clothes have been boxed and given away to friends or to goodwill.  i had come to terms with the fact that baby cash was going to be our last baby and anything and everything that doesn't fit him has been given away.  it wasn't easy at first, but then i became excited about the new phase in our life we were about to experience. 

the diaper-less phase didn't seem so far away.  the days when we don't have to worry about being home in time for naps seemed so close.  it was exciting.  and i truly couldn't wait.


sometimes, God has to remind me that he is in control and i'm not.  because quite frankly, i'm the type of person that would rather get things done on my own if i don't see results instead of patiently waiting for God's direction.  when i start doing things my way, instead allowing God to take control and following his lead, things can get pretty messed up (including my own mental and spiritual state).  i tend to start losing focus on what's really important and forget the big picture.  

when that happens, i've noticed that God will do things to set me back on his path.  those things can come in many forms, but each time it has happened i'm always glad i didn't get off the track too far.

the day after christmas we discovered some surprising news.  after thinking with certainty that baby cash will forever be our baby we found out that the good Lord had other plans in store for us in that department.  honestly, the news was received more with shock than with excitement.  how can this be?  seriously?  impossible!  i can't believe this! 

we chose not to share the news with anyone at first, because i don't think we were able to quite fully process what was happening.  but the more time has passed and the more that we share this good news with family and friends the more that i'm starting to change my mindset.  i don't mean to imply (even from when we first found out) that this baby is going to be a burden on our family.  that's not the case at all.  i have full faith that God will provide for our needs.  why else would he bless us with another baby?  but i just have to backtrack a little.  change my perspective back to how it was when i didn't know whether or not cash was going to be the last baby.

so for the next 7.5 months i will have to bid adieu to my beloved sushi, vino and brewskies, and cut back (big-time) on my coffee addiction.  and while you may not find me showing much excitement at the moment, i can feel it creeping in...even as i write this post.  our lives will forever be changed again, and what a blessing that will be!


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Melissa said...

Wow!! Congratulations! While I can imagine the surprise, this baby is blessed to be born into such a loving family. Love to all of you.

Ponytails and pretties said...

I know exactly how you feel. I pretty much cried through the entire first trimester with Zach. I went through the motions, but don't think I was truly excited until the 7th month. Here we are with 2 babies 9.5months apart. While a few more months between them would be nice, I wouldn't trade Zach for the world! Be patient. You'll get there. As much as I like to give you grief, I'm (we all) are so happy for you. I'm always here to talk, listen, vent to or cry with! I had 3 very awesome women remind me over and over, God wont give you more than you can handle and he must love you quite a bit to bless you with another one of His children. I'll be happy to remind you of that any time you need to hear it!

Jenna's Mom said...

Congratulations!!! This will be a much loved and wonderful baby. Please clarify, though, does this put the ball back in Jenna and Jon's court?!!

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